Dude, where's my broomstick?

thealphagirl:

delightanddelirium:

I like all the rude words for vagina, like quim, cunt, pussy. They’re the best.　

*sadly parts with Black Feminist card*

LOL I was just going to make a post about this after I saw that thing you reblogged. I actually really likr the word ‘quim’. It’s reeeeeeeal nice lol. and cunt obviously

quim is an awesome word. I think it’s the hard “c” sound. Also, it made me feel really smart to know what a quim even was when I watched The Avengers #saddo

and cunt is great, but I wish people would stop using it to mean “person who is an idiot and I don’t like” D:

6 hours ago on May 29, 2012 at 01:07am

12 notes

via delightanddelirium

I like all the rude words for vagina, like quim, cunt, pussy. They’re the best.　

*sadly parts with Black Feminist card*

#hence the quim mewl line #if osmeone said that to me I'd be impressed ngl #but then I'm easily impressed #so maybe that's not a measure of anything

6 hours ago on May 29, 2012 at 01:00am

12 notes

zoom

howtopickupafangirl:

How to Pick Up a Fangirl: Pick Up Lines

Submitted by delightanddelirium

#sing it to the tune of bed rock and it will never leave your head #this is what I spend my time doing #making up creepy fandom-related chat up lines #I should become a professional pick up demonstrator for geeks #Loki #Tom Hiddleston

6 hours ago on May 29, 2012 at 12:51am

76 notes

via howtopickupafangirl

zoom

pullofthemoon:

mocking-potter:thefirsthorcrux:

#the only time they ever saw each other old

Fuck, Tumblr, it’s been YEARS, get some grief counselling already. Quit bumming me out at work.

#Harry Potter #the weasleys #heartache

7 hours ago on May 29, 2012 at 12:21am

5,765 notes

via feelpain

littlewendycat:

iphysianthe:

special-k-art:

saathi1013:

chicagoartnerd:

Scarlett Johansson & Dita von Teese for Flaunt Magazine.

WHAT. O.O

Holy jeebus.

I

um

UM

hot a what

oh my GOD
slkjfkadf

#the beautiful women tag #Scarlett Johansson #Dita Von Teese #what wondrous devilry is this??!!!

23 hours ago on May 28, 2012 at 07:49am

5,180 notes

via starktrek

zoom

doctorwho:

Madame Vastra & Jenny Appreciation Day

circusgifs:

Madame Vastra : She’s definitely a girl
Jenny : Oh, stop it !

Doctor Who, 607, A Good Man Goes To War

#doctor who #madame vastra #jenny #I remember snorting at most of this episode #I quite honestly think moffat is the king of writing to both kids and adults at the same time #bravo

1 day ago on May 27, 2012 at 03:58pm

630 notes

via circusgifs

Dad: is he a "omo" ?
Me: What is omo? He is not soap
Dad: No! I mean he is "omo"
Me: Omo is so soap daddy, why are you calling him soap?
Dad: No! I am saying like he likes men! He is "omo"
Me: You mean "homo"
Dad: *side-eye* is that no what i have been saying this whole time?

#truth #this is how we do naija style

1 day ago on May 27, 2012 at 07:56am

37 notes

via iamforevernigerian

my marriage (if i get married)

me: hey darlin welcome home
husband: *kiss* hey baby how are you to-
me: take off your pants
--------------------------------------------
husband: hey i just ordered some chinese food
me: how long did they say it would take?
husband: about 30 mins
me: get naked
husband: but i thought we were gonna-
me: naked. now
---------------------------------------------
husband: i'm bored
me: lay down.now
-----------------------------------------------
me: i love you so much
husband: i love you too...it's a beautiful saturday morning and i don't have to work today. We should go to the park and-
me: get in the bed
-----------------------------------------------
husband: there is this great new bookstore around the corner wanna go?
me: nope.sex
husband: but they have that book you wanted and i was-
me: sex
------------------------------------------------
me: i had a crappy day at work today
husband: want me to make you some tea?
me: i want you naked. i'm angry
husband: what about a back rub?
me: naked...drop your pants
husband: you mean you don't want to talk about it? really?!
me: drop your pants and put ya dick in my mouth...this is not a fucking game.

#truth #this is what I always imagine marriage to be for me #whoever I end up marrying #it would just be sex on tap #can you tell I'm incredibly sheltered? #sex

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 09:39pm

15,067 notes

via super-eklectic1

zoom

queerhairyvag:

bromance-enthusiast:

heyfunniest:

“NOW, BABY BROTHER, HOLD MY HAND WHILE WE CROSS THE STREET.”

“Thor, stop that. I’m an adult.”

“HOLD MY HAND, BROTHER.”

“I’m not your brother.”

“HOLD MY HAND.”

“Fine.

“HALT DEAR BROTHER—I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THE PROPER ACTION BEFORE CROSSING A MIDGARDIAN STREET IS TO LOOK BOTH WAYS. ALLOW ME TO DO SO FOR THE BOTH OF US.”

“Thor, every mode of transportation these pathetic humans have created would only bruise us at best—”

“THAT IS NOT THE POINT, BROTHER. AS GODS IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THE YOUNGER GENERATION!”

“How many times must I remind you that such sentimental nonsense will have no sway over my decisions?”

“THINK OF THE MIDGARDIAN CHILDREN, BROTHER!”

“…”

“…”

“…THE CHILDREN!”

best cosplayers ever, they look almost like the real thing

#Loki #Thor #The Avengers #perfection #the petulant look on Loki's face is so perfect

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 09:38pm

25,778 notes

via jillypooh

liquornspice:

Yo, if you ever get the urge to lecture African Americans about the sanctity of mixed-raceness you may want to…not. Just don’t. I promise everything you say will be bullshit that stomps all over the erasure we live with every day while continuing to be “just” Black.

^^^ applies to Britain too, in different ways.

(via karnythia)

#truth #race

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 04:01pm

32 notes

via liquornspice

JKR IS WRITING THREE MORE HP BOOKS ›

apothecarist:

danceanthems:

“Bloomsbury, the publisher of the “Harry Potter” series by author JK Rowling, also said it was counting on a new Rowling three-book box set tied into the Potter series, and a non-fiction account of spies in World War II to support sales in the coming year.”

(via dorianway)

#Harry Potter #NO NO NO NO DON'T PHUNK WITH MY HEART #please let this be true #I checked the website and the article was written for days ago so not an April Fools'... #dare I hope? dare I?

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 10:28am

18,322 notes

via -kunis

We let Willow cut her hair. When you have a little girl, it’s like how can you teach her that you’re in control of her body? If I teach her that I’m in charge of whether or not she can touch her hair, she’s going to replace me with some other man when she goes out in the world. She can’t cut my hair but that’s her hair. She has got to have command of her body. So when she goes out into the world, she’s going out with a command that it is hers. She is used to making those decisions herself. We try to keep giving them those decisions until they can hold the full weight of their lives.

(On why he let Willow cut all of her hair off)

Read more: Will Smith On Allowing Willow To Cut Her Hair: ‘She Has Got To Have Command Of Her Body’ | Necole Bitchie.com

- He raises a really great point. What would it mean to believe very early that my body was mine. That it’s not for anyone or for any particular purpose other than to be mine until I decide otherwise.

(via larepublicadedet)

That’s honestly one of the best things I’ve ever heard come out of an actor’s mouth.

(via dassitright)

#Will Smith #I grew up on a diet of Fresh Prince reruns #and now you go and say this! #ngl I only love and respect you so much more #can we please have a round of applause for this guy? #THAT IS HOW PARENTHOOD IS DONE; PLEASE TAKE NOTES

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 10:24am

11,039 notes

via larepublicadedet

zoom

damnlayoffthebleach:

Princess Andromeda by *CORinAZONe

Marco: AS IT SHOULD BE.

#Andromeda #classics #THANK YOU #tired of seeing an Ethiopian princess drawn or cast as a blonde woman #art #beautiful #yes yes yes #submission

2 days ago on May 26, 2012 at 10:22am

29 notes

via damnlayoffthebleach

kyssthis16:

thiscantbecorrect:

Wait, so…Chris Evans’ mom helped him figure out how to use Twitter today. And Octavia Spencer and Chris Evans are the kind of BFFs that bring their laptops to each other’s houses and don’t talk to each other unless the other one gets the blue screen of death and/or needs some help figuring out how to use web applications?

nanner:

kitty-to-karen:

alcoholicgifts:

faramirs:

Y’all. His mother is literally helping him learn how to use Twitter.

How dare he.

#NOOOOPE

He is a motherboy and it is endearing as hell.

I CANNOT. I HAVE LOST THE ABILITY TO CAN.

I love that his mama is so much more adept than he at this whole social medial thing. He is beyond adorable! I can’t with him!